Regrets
by Lilian85
Summary: Lily came back to Hogwarts after 2 years of disappearence. But why did she?


Hey, this little ans short One-Shot was in my head for a while now before I wrote it down. It's again L/J! I hope you like it!

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****Regrets**

It was a late Saturday evening in the middle of October when James entered the Gryffindor common room and saw Lily sitting in front of the fire. Everybody else was out somewhere so it was really quiet.

James had been out on the Quidditch pitch practising with his fellow team. He had been their captain for three years and had never lost a game since then.

Now he came back to catch his Transfiguration stuff since they had been assigned to give in a three inch roll on Monday on a very difficult topic. Since he was not fond on doing work on a Sunday he would have to do his homework today. And the earlier you start, the earlier you're finished with it!

But now that he saw Lily sitting there all by herself and obviously deep in thought, James changed his mind and strolled over to her.

He sat down beside her not really sure whether she had noticed him or not. After a few moments of sitting there without having said a word, Lily slowly turned her face to face James.

She had known that it was him since he had entered the room. Every time James was near her she felt her heart pounding and her eyes started searching for him automatically. A sudden heat was rising in her and all thoughts vanished when meeting his eyes.

"May I ask what the matter is?" his deep male voiced forced its way into her thoughts. Lily loved to hear his voice because often it was loaded with so many emotions that made it easy for her to read his thoughts. But sometimes she had the strange feeling that she often was the only person with the ability to read James' thoughts. Why, she did not know.

"Why do you think something is wrong?" she answered his question with another one. Although Lily knew that she could trust James without doubts, but she still was not a person to spill out her problems easily.

"Well, probably because you're sitting here with your thoughts obviously not here! And, to be honest, I've never seen you not doing anything at all!" James added the last sentence with a smile to tell her not to get mad at him. Sometimes he still was not sure how Lily would react.

Even though they had called it a truth when they had found out that both had been given the head position to, but James still did not know her that good.

But to his relief she only smiled when answering his question silently.

"I was thinking about the reason why I had been coming back here."

Lily had left Hogwarts in the middle of their fifth school year without anybody knowing. Only the teachers had seemingly been informed but they did not tell anything. Than she had appeared again at the start of their seventh and final school year here at Hogwarts one and a half month ago. But again, nobody answered only questions not even Lily.

"And what was the reason?" James asked curiously. Maybe she would tell him now.

"To be honest, I didn't come back for Cathy or for Hogwarts itself. I came back to tell someone something important."

James didn't say anything for a few moments for Lily to tell more but it seemed that she wouldn't tell more willingly. So he had to push her on a little bit more.

"And what exactly did you want to tell this person?" He hoped that he would get to know more about the reason than the concerning person. Maybe he could figure that out later because he was sure that Lily would not tell who it was easily.

"I wanted to tell him that I love him with all my heart and I always did." She smiled sadly into the fire. "But I never gave him a chance. I was too stubborn to look behind the picture I had panted of him but never truly tried to see the person behind it."

Somehow James had the feeling than there was more to it than she told him.

"Is there something else?"

"He has a girlfriend. He probably forgot about me!" Still looking sadly she turned to him. "I'm sorry but I'm tired. Do you mind if I head up to my dorm?"

James shook his head. "Good night, Lily!" He was disappointed that she left so early and for not telling him the whole story.

Lily had already stood up and was on her way to the stairs that lead to the girls dormitories.

Suddenly James turned around.

"Lily, wait!"

Slowly she turned around and James saw tears in her eyes.

"Yeah?"

"Why didn't you tell him about your feelings?"

A sad smile graced her tear-strained face. "I just did!"

With that said she quickly turned around and ran up the stairs.

And James stood there with a pounding heart. All his bottled-up feelings for this woman came back on the surface and he knew that he still loved her the same he always had.


End file.
